DC3 for ever (pfft!)

As Stu left for work on his own this morning, I can't begin to describe how bereft I felt. So humiliated by all that had transpired in the last twenty four hours. I couldn't even enjoy a sleep in, so upset was I. So, I wept for a good fifteen minutes. Sobbed and allowed myself to feel every bit of anguish, fear and hurt.

The uncertainty is bad, I really don't like not knowing what my future holds. I've gone through a kind of grieving process, you know, the denial-anger-bargaining-depression-acceptance scenario. Though, the anger phase tends to creep back up on me if I dwell on the situation. Like, 'It's his fault for not utilising resources effectively', or 'Trust men to fire an engaged girl with no qualifications just before Christmas'. It bites, but it is what it is, and it's not healthy to dwell.

Everyone's telling me how employable I am, how I'll be back on my feet in no time. I sincerely hope that is the case. But at this time of year, my efforts will likely be hindered. Who employs staff over the holidays? And really, I'm picky. I don't do weekends, I am very reluctant to take calls, I want it to be within a reasonable distance from home, I want career progression. All this from a person who doesn't have a license, doesn't have a degree. Hurrah.

So, I did some sudoku, calmed down, then my conscience yelled "Get over yourself woman!" I pulled on my running gear, and left.

Thank the heavens above for Destiny's Child. (Don't diss me!)
Just as my stride began to languish, 'Survivor' popped up, and inspired me to run twice my usual distance. 'Happy Face' reminded me to appreciate the beauty of the little things. However, their song featuring the line 'Thank you, Lord, hallelujah, you've been so good to me' was a little lost on this little bruised duck.
Regardless, feeling all womanly and empowered, I continued down the Nepean highway, investigating the streets studded with homes belonging to those ridiculously privileged, with views of the bay and Sweetwater Creek. I found the quaint little shopping strip on Norman Avenue, which all the real estate guides praise so enthusiastically. A cool shower washed away the evidence of my efforts, likely saving me from heatstroke! An elderly couple offered me firewood. And after two and a half hours of running, walking, blisters, and 'glowing' (I am a lady, after all!), I jogged home one happy chicky.

I'm optimistic. I'm looking forward to bumping into former colleagues as a slimmer, healthier Janet. I'm looking forward to the phone call telling me that I can start work on Monday. But for now, I'm glad that I can lighten Stu's burdens by taking care of all the chores, and catch up on Dr. Phil, Oprah and Entertainment Tonight, and be paid for it! (Seriously, I have to focus on the positives.)

Biggest positive - Sussy's birthday!
I'm so deeply in love with this girl, and wish for her every happiness. Enjoy the next two hours, precious pie!