Real estate, shmeal estate!
Oh, how I loathe real estate, and the ninnys who deal in it.
Okay, I'm a young-un, so still at the renting stage. Yep, we could probably buy now if we wanted to, but would be sacrificing the lifestyle that we love for the sake of a 'renovator's delight', which we have no intention of renovating. I'm a high heels, pretty nails kinda gal, and even if my history in Industrial Design renders me the perfect candidate for driving nails into walls and installing Corian benchtops, I'd prefer to just move into something gorgeous and enjoy it straight away. Besides, the amount you need to spend to turn a dilapidated wreck into a swanky retreat negates the initial sacrifice.
We're good tenants. We treat the house we live in as if it were our own. We tend the garden, keep everything meticulously clean, to the point where the agents at my last real estate said that it was a pleasure to inspect the property we'd just vacated, as it was so well maintained. We've come to expect general gushing from all who are welcomed into our home, as it's a nice place to be.
So that's not where my problem is - the drama lies in the administration. These people are paid to keep keys, and give them to people so that they can access particular houses. Surely there is a filing system so that once it is established to which house a key belongs, it can always be found?
Apparently not at any real estate I've dealt with! At the last house we lived in, whenever it came time for routine inspection, they would try a few times to get in themselves, then admit defeat and book a time when we could let them in. I made copies of our keys, and left them with the real estate, but it seems that they just couldn't get their heads around the 'stick key in lock, turn key, open door' philosophy.
Despite their praise of our treatment of this property it took two months to get my bond back! There is a law that stipulates bond is to be returned within 10 days of vacating a property, so of course I tried to investigate. By investigate, I mean 'attempted fruitlessly to contact my agent'. I left so many messages, I thought they might take out a restraining order. I was always polite (maybe that's why I was ignored), but it wasn't until I actually spoke to a human being about four weeks later that I was told, 'Oh, your application was rejected by the RTBA because your signature has changed'. Que?! You couldn't have told me this weeks ago? I had to get a statutory declaration made up to prove I was who I claimed to be, and after a few more weeks of agent fiddling, was rewarded with my funds. I wasn't in desperate need of the money, but what happens to the people who use their last bond to fund their next bond? I was apparently within my rights to report this, and the real estate would have been fined, but I'd just rather move on...
...to the next real estate. Where they gave us the wrong keys on moving in day. Where they didn't keep a set of keys for themselves. Where they took four months to give us keys to our side door, so that we could enter via our garage, instead of quickly closing the automatic door, running underneath it, and entering through the front door.
Replay 'agent can't inspect property without flow charts and guide dog' scenario. We made them a set of keys. Which they thought belonged to some other property, which we apparently owned. Then they thought we wanted to rent that imaginary property. Then they thought we were vacating said property.
They also advised us the wrong date for the inspection, so that eventually we had prepared for this visit 3 times! Doesn't everyone shine their place to perfection when an agent will be traipsing through? How frustrating!
The first time I paid my monthly rental installment for the lovenest, I had to do so in cash at their office, as they had not set up my 'easy payment' account. And thus I got to have another glimpse of these fools in their natural habitat. There were tenants having to enter properties through windows, for lack of correct keys. Lots of mistaken identities, general dimwittedness all round.
I received a letter from them the other day, declaring 'new payment system!'. Hooray, says I, their 'easy' system was a headache, which they actually charged you extra to use.
'Simply mail or email us to cancel your old service', exclaims the letter. So I worded an enthusiastic, yet concise request to this effect, and popped it in the digital mail.
A reply comes back that afternoon from the 'Assistant Portfolio Manager' : read 'filing monkey'. Three paragraphs, containing one comma, one full stop, completely italicised in giant text. 'You will need to call XXXX to do that...blah blah...I think I might have told you before in a previous email'
Um, no, we've never emailed before. And the letter stated that you would organise cessation of lacklustre service. Why didn't you just include that phone number on the letter? Are you lonely? Do you need me clogging up your already failing routine with correspondence? Are you missing visits to your optometrist?
What a box of tools.
Okay, I'm a young-un, so still at the renting stage. Yep, we could probably buy now if we wanted to, but would be sacrificing the lifestyle that we love for the sake of a 'renovator's delight', which we have no intention of renovating. I'm a high heels, pretty nails kinda gal, and even if my history in Industrial Design renders me the perfect candidate for driving nails into walls and installing Corian benchtops, I'd prefer to just move into something gorgeous and enjoy it straight away. Besides, the amount you need to spend to turn a dilapidated wreck into a swanky retreat negates the initial sacrifice.
We're good tenants. We treat the house we live in as if it were our own. We tend the garden, keep everything meticulously clean, to the point where the agents at my last real estate said that it was a pleasure to inspect the property we'd just vacated, as it was so well maintained. We've come to expect general gushing from all who are welcomed into our home, as it's a nice place to be.
So that's not where my problem is - the drama lies in the administration. These people are paid to keep keys, and give them to people so that they can access particular houses. Surely there is a filing system so that once it is established to which house a key belongs, it can always be found?
Apparently not at any real estate I've dealt with! At the last house we lived in, whenever it came time for routine inspection, they would try a few times to get in themselves, then admit defeat and book a time when we could let them in. I made copies of our keys, and left them with the real estate, but it seems that they just couldn't get their heads around the 'stick key in lock, turn key, open door' philosophy.
Despite their praise of our treatment of this property it took two months to get my bond back! There is a law that stipulates bond is to be returned within 10 days of vacating a property, so of course I tried to investigate. By investigate, I mean 'attempted fruitlessly to contact my agent'. I left so many messages, I thought they might take out a restraining order. I was always polite (maybe that's why I was ignored), but it wasn't until I actually spoke to a human being about four weeks later that I was told, 'Oh, your application was rejected by the RTBA because your signature has changed'. Que?! You couldn't have told me this weeks ago? I had to get a statutory declaration made up to prove I was who I claimed to be, and after a few more weeks of agent fiddling, was rewarded with my funds. I wasn't in desperate need of the money, but what happens to the people who use their last bond to fund their next bond? I was apparently within my rights to report this, and the real estate would have been fined, but I'd just rather move on...
...to the next real estate. Where they gave us the wrong keys on moving in day. Where they didn't keep a set of keys for themselves. Where they took four months to give us keys to our side door, so that we could enter via our garage, instead of quickly closing the automatic door, running underneath it, and entering through the front door.
Replay 'agent can't inspect property without flow charts and guide dog' scenario. We made them a set of keys. Which they thought belonged to some other property, which we apparently owned. Then they thought we wanted to rent that imaginary property. Then they thought we were vacating said property.
They also advised us the wrong date for the inspection, so that eventually we had prepared for this visit 3 times! Doesn't everyone shine their place to perfection when an agent will be traipsing through? How frustrating!
The first time I paid my monthly rental installment for the lovenest, I had to do so in cash at their office, as they had not set up my 'easy payment' account. And thus I got to have another glimpse of these fools in their natural habitat. There were tenants having to enter properties through windows, for lack of correct keys. Lots of mistaken identities, general dimwittedness all round.
I received a letter from them the other day, declaring 'new payment system!'. Hooray, says I, their 'easy' system was a headache, which they actually charged you extra to use.
'Simply mail or email us to cancel your old service', exclaims the letter. So I worded an enthusiastic, yet concise request to this effect, and popped it in the digital mail.
A reply comes back that afternoon from the 'Assistant Portfolio Manager' : read 'filing monkey'. Three paragraphs, containing one comma, one full stop, completely italicised in giant text. 'You will need to call XXXX to do that...blah blah...I think I might have told you before in a previous email'
Um, no, we've never emailed before. And the letter stated that you would organise cessation of lacklustre service. Why didn't you just include that phone number on the letter? Are you lonely? Do you need me clogging up your already failing routine with correspondence? Are you missing visits to your optometrist?
What a box of tools.
posted by Janet | 10:15 am
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